


Falling

by Drekaxander



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, Author is dealing with stuff, M/M, Past Violence, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Swearing, Watcher Charles | Grian, You Have Been Warned, no happy ending, no one understands, past trauma, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 00:08:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29073075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drekaxander/pseuds/Drekaxander
Summary: Grain is faced with a choice and he chooses to fulfill a 15 year old promise.Things happen, blood is spilt, tears are shed, and through it all.People still end up being jerks.
Relationships: Grian/Mumbo
Comments: 7
Kudos: 52





	1. Fight or Flight

**Author's Note:**

> Yes I know that I could have posted another chapter to my other fanfic... But I really wanted to write this idea.
> 
> Also this is a permadeath fanfic, they will not respawn!

The first thing Grian had been told when he joined Hermitcraft, was that they dislike watchers. This was a big problem. Grian was a watcher, so naturally he hid that fact and pretended to be on the same page as them. Don't get him wrong, he hated watchers.

Grian was careful to keep his secret safe, though he eventually became less cautious. Grian would put on his mask and cloak when he was really upset. That was the case right now.

He was making a secret base in Impulse's base when he got caught. Impulse had said something that brought back years of bad memories. He knew that Impulse wasn't like them, but he couldn't help than run away and hide in the HEP tower with his watcher outfit.

The Turf War had ended about a month ago, so he wasn't worried about someone going to grab extra supplies or be there for a meeting. He did forget that the HEP tower was in the SD and that other hermits are passing through all day.

He sat on the edge of the HEP base and just cried for 20 minutes. He only stopped because he heard someone walking by. In an attempt to hide himself he turned and started moving to the inside. Once he a deemed it safe he slowly walked back to the edge. He froze there when the cold netherite of a sword was at the back of his neck. "Going somewhere _watcher_?"

Grian quickly distorted his voice so that he wouldn't be recognized. "Hello Iskall."

"You shouldn't know my name. Why are you here?" When Grian didn't respond due to a lack of an idea, Iskall continued. "Not gonna talk. You will eventually."

"And why is that?" Grian asked with a slight tremor in his voice.

"I messaged the other hermits when I saw you." As if on cue rockets and footsteps were heard. "Ah, Hello X."

Grian turned to see at least half the hermits in front of him. "First Impulse and bad memories, then this."

Impulse stepped forward with a confused look on his face. "I've never met you? How did I do anything?"

"You'll find out eventually." Grain didn't want to outright tell them that he was Grian because then they would hate him.

"Enough with the weird messages. Why are you here?" False also pointed her sword at him as X spoke.

"What? I can't visit my own home?" Grian stepped backwards and teetered on the edge of the ledge. He knew that if he fell he would definitely die, "Look you don't understand."

Doc's trident was raised and pointed at Grian's head, "Don't understand what?" The half creeper wasn't amused with Grian's attempt at saving himself.

"Who I am."

X spoke again. "I think we do though. You. Are. A. Watcher. And we hate watchers. Guess what we do to watchers." Grian gulped, he knew what they did and it wasn't pretty. Just a tip, avoid dying to ravagers, it really hurts.

"One last thing before I die." Grian had made a promise to himself when he was a child, if he was going to die by someone else or die on his own terms. He would die on his own terms.

He would fulfill his promise.

Grian quickly pulled off his mask and with a sad smile, he spoke in his normal voice. "I'll always love you guys." He stepped of the building and fell.

The last thing he heard was Mumbo shout his name and break down crying. His back blossomed with pain and vision went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have fun crying until a new chapter is out! >:D


	2. Forever and Always

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MIND THE TAGS!
> 
> DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU

He could feel a soft sheet. Wait. He could feel a soft sheet. Why could he feel a sheet! He should be dead, he fell of a building! Grian groaned when he remembered that he was probably saved by the hermits so that they could kill him.

Grian heard faint voices yelling 'he's awake' and 'get the others'.

After a few minutes, Grian slowly opened his eyes. A semi-circle of hermits were around him. His eyes widened with fear with the thought of his _friends_ laughing and cheering at his pain. "Grian!" A disheveled looking Mumbo ran in and hugged him. "Oh Grian I was so worried. Why didn't you just tell us? You didn't have to throw yourself off a roof to avoid us!" Some of the hermits had the same face of concern as Mumbo, whereas the rest had a look of hatred.

"Why?" Grian needed to know why he was still alive. "Why am I not dead? I should be dead! I was so close to being dead! If you're going to hate me for being a watcher than why didn't you guys let me die! I was so fucking close!" Tears ran down his face as he yelled.

The hermits just looked shocked, Mumbo stepped back and looked even more concerned that before. "Grian. You are our friend. We wouldn't just let you die." Mumbo spoke with more force that he had ever heard from him before.

"People have said that to me before! Then they proceeded to try and kill me several times. So many fucking times." Grian was started to cry at the memories. "I gave up so long ago. I tried so hard for this to be over. The only reason that I hadn't died on Hermitcraft was because I thought that you guys were my _friends_. I thought that it would be better here. I was so fucking close this time!"

"Grian." Mumbo had his own tears being shed. "Why didn't you try and tell us? I would have listened. I would have tried to help!"

"No." Grian spoke with a new tone, coldness. "No. Not again. You would have been like every other fucking person who said that." Grian looked at the rest of the hermits as he continued to speak. "Tell me. Did any of you wonder why I was so skilled at bandaging injuries? Why I knew how to make a sword out of any material? Why I could fucking divuse TNT in less than a minute?"

When no one proceeded to respond Grian continued with pure rage at this point. "I have been through fucking hell! I was abandoned by everyone I trusted when I was 10! I wasn't even a watcher because I wanted to! I was forced. Forced to watch my friends die. Forced to watch Evo burn to the fucking ground. I had to bandage stab wounds and arrow wounds. I was forced lived with a murder for 4 years! Anyone notice how my eyes are different colors? Incase you were wondering, I lost my eye to my _friend_ when I was 14! It was what he called 'my birthday gift'."

"Grian, I-I'm so sorry. I can't believe that you had to deal with all that." Mumbo's fear and sorrow was heard when he spoke.

Grian still had rage flowing through him. "That isn't even fucking half of it! So don't be like 'we're so sorry Grian, what can we do Grian?' Well I can tell you what you can fucking do. Let me have a fucking knife so that I can end this! Finally end this!"

Mumbo tried to speak, but alas he couldn't get out more than a broken sob. So instead Doc took the lead. That wasn't a good thing. "No. We shouldn't let him just get out of this that easily. Let's not forget that he is a literal WATCHER!" Shouts of agreement were heard.

"Fine. Then I'll do it myself." A burst of purple magic spread from Grian and knocked over the hermits in the room. Grian quickly ran into another room and locked the door before the hermits could stop him.

He stood in the room as his frie- _the hermits_ tried their best to get inside. He walked towards a table that conveniently had a knife on it. "Goodbye." At that he thrusted the knife into his chest and watched himself bleed out with a smile before he fell unconscious.

He finally got what he wanted. No one could save him. No one could help him.

**He is dead. Forever and always.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...
> 
> Thoughts?
> 
> Yeah I'm sorry. I'm just using this fic to vent.
> 
> Feel free to write a different ending to this. I just think that this is how I want this to end here.


End file.
